What does your heart break for?
Desire to see evidence of change, to know we had a hand in that change compels us to give more, do more, be more. Hearts are poured out into worthy causes, after all, we should, “…look not only to our own interests, but also to the interest of others…”*
The dilemma with causes is self-gratification vs. sacrifice. Give a buck, write a name on a slip of paper taped to the wall and instantly Americans stand tall and proud because they “supported a worthwhile cause”. With a scant sacrifice, consumers pay for a feeling; food will be on the table, gas in the car…life is essentially disrupted.
Engaging the same problem time and again without a euphoric feeling or indication of change, I grow complacent, bored and numb in my marriage. I would welcome an opportunity to simply throw a buck at a dispute and feel good…but that’s not what real causes are about…that’s not what real love is built on.
Today, we take up a cause that will have personal cost.
Looking in the box taken off the shelf, will you accept who you married right now in as-is condition? Days or decades of hurt, feeling dismissed, invisible, as if your spouse will never know how to love you may be all you can see when you peer in the box…I felt much of that last night during while arguing my husband and then I got a gentle nudge from God this morning…
”That’s how I love you. Gentle daughter, you are frayed, worse for wear, you have dismissed me for temporary distractions, ignored me when I called you, but I never let you go. Surrounding you while you live unaware, I actively love you.”
The question is who are we are loving? “Loving” a spouse when we feel good is really loving ourselves. Love, true love faces the storms and never lets go. No longer about temporal personal happiness, true love guards and protects the best interest of a spouse. We do it for our friends; we stick by their side when we see the train wreck about to happen yet most fail to do this with their spouse. The vested interest in marriage, knowing a spouse’s debacle will deeply affect your life raises the stakes, most fold.
Today is the day- take on the most local cause to your heart- your spouse. Invest generously in active love!
Heart Check: How will you handle the looming hurts that will come with the cause of loving your spouse?
Reality Check: I’m not opposed to supporting causes or giving a small amount at the cash register. Please do not get sidetracked from the intended purpose of the illustration.