Currently I’m raising a 5, 2 and thirty-something…maybe you know what I mean? How quickly the line between a spouse and the kids can become blurred.
Those in the trenches know it’s not merely the kids who need raising within a family, it’s the parents. Crossing the threshold of adulthood while embracing the ridiculous notion of being “grown-up” is a sure sign of the series of life lessons to come!
Shifting the attention from undeveloped parts of my heart, the areas growth was stunted for whatever reason, I quickly step in to parent my husband as I would our children. Surely you don’t ever do that to your spouse…
Look at me.
You’re saying it wrong.
You should listen to me, I’m right about this.
The danger-bomb pride and lack of knowledge create.
If for a moment I hide myself among the casual crowd at the coffee shop I can escape immediate parenting responsibilities only to face the broken child within. She needs guidance no different from children I’m raising. “Older and wiser” yet it never seems like I’m wise enough to keep my mouth shut, to build up, to wait…
Over and over the Bible promises “wisdom to those who ask”*. Nearly always, if I’m honest, I don’t realize the immediate intervention that comes by seeking God’s wisdom; that because I sincerely asked, despite my elephant-in-the room flaws, it had been granted. Static turns to euphoric harmony the moment this reality is acknowledged.
The strings I’ve attached to my family for my safety and peace of mind can be cut. No longer do the undeveloped parts of my heart need to hold me back or strangle those around me. I am free to grow up in the areas He is still working in me; privileged to be a part of others growing into the people God created them to be.
Heart Check: What would it look like for you to step back and allow others to grow into the person they were created for, rather than the person you want to mold them to be?
* “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.” James 1:5
“For the Lord gives wisdom;
From His mouth come knowledge and understanding;” Proverbs 2:6