“It’s better to live alone in the corner of an attic than with a quarrelsome wife in a lovely home.” -Proverbs
I may be wrong, but it seems to me that females are always in need of primping something. As teens, girls primp and fuss about appearance….seriously, there are many who spend HOURS perfecting their look before making a daily appearance to the world (a far cry from the five minutes I’m lucky to snatch as a mommy). As a grown woman, this often morphs into creating a perfect home (even those who don’t have couture furnishings can still fall prey to this).
As I’ve been living with myself, a new challenge has arisen, that goes far beyond Martha or Mary and Home With Friends.…it cuts to the very heart of the matter: Who am I to the person I’ve partnered to venture through life with?
Honestly, it’s easy to be kind, hospitable and to slap on a smile for friends; it’s our family (arguably neighbors too) who know us best and see the stinky messes inside our hearts (in too many ways my toddlers fits aren’t so different from my own). The knee-jerk reactions that are unwarranted, the snippy tone of voice (or silent treatment) and the deepest level of selfishness displayed are all tell-tell signs of serious heart disease.
If I get my way, if “I win”- what exactly do I win? A husband who feels unloved? A home where people walk on egg shells? I home that family avoids? A home where people can’t be honest, speak openly and freely?
Peaceful homes take work, but the most challenging part of that work is going counter-culture, GIVING of one’s self. I’d rather live in a shack of love than a cold palace.
Heart Check: At the end of the day, what have you won by your attitudes and actions? What are you building?